What Are We Looking For - Success, Happiness, Or Something in Between?

10.10.2009 20:52

A man spent the last twenty two years of his life preparing to catch a "success" train bound to "somewhere". He watched as the doors closed after one last man got in. "I won't give up" he thought to himself, "I would just have to catch up to it sooner or later." And so he began to "run" towards it. He was adamant; his only problem was, every time he got close to it, the train seemed to accelerate. That was just a small deterrent he had to overcome, he would persevere. Yes, he could do it! And so, he continued to surge forward after the train. Unquestionably, his persistence was commendable, until one day, tired and exhausted, he realized he was chasing a dream. He needed to relinquish this chase so he could go on with his life. Somehow, it didn't seem to matter anymore; it was futile! He realized that while he was chasing this train, a big chunk of his life had passed by, without his notice. He had missed experiencing life! Now that his obsession to get on board was vanquished, he could change course and explore new possibilities. He could see things he never noticed before. He felt free and elated. Sometimes, he had mixed feelings of dread and wonderment about his future. He understood that out there, a whole world full of new challenges and experiences was waiting for him. And so, he comfortably settled.

As the years went by, he understood that his destination was still "somewhere." He was just taking a different road to get there. His life was full of activities that kept him busy, lots of different stimulators that engaged his intelligence. He was building his "castle" one stone at a time. So, he tried these new things, and worked through these new challenges. As the years went by, he found his own place in the scheme of things. He was treasured with a good life, a loving wife, happy children, and grandchildren. He felt very happy and fortunate; it was a good place to be. He realized he was pretty lucky the way things turned out.

Another man spent twenty five years getting ready for an express train to "somewhere." He made it just as the doors were closing. Breathlessly, he looked out the window and noticed a man running after the train, he thought: "Poor man." He was overjoyed that he had not missed the opportunities. He committed himself to accomplishing as much as possible before reaching his destination. It was expeditious, before long, everything was a blur. He plowed ahead while the years went by. How fortunate he felt! He had made it to the top with a lot to show for it: a great job, a lot of money, a hectic lifestyle, a grand house, a wife, and even a couple of kids. Was that enough? No! He wanted all. His list was endless. His children felt like strangers to him, and he couldn't even remember why. His wife left him a long time ago. Where did the time go? When did everything go so wrong? One thing he knew for sure, he could not stop now. He had to forge ahead. There were too many things to do, too many dreams to fulfill, and too many places to go. Sometimes, during rational moments, he would ask himself, "why?"

Many years later, this man, although now an old man, reached his destination. There was nothing else to do but retire. What was he to do now? Physically, he felt lousy, the many years of hectic living had caught up with him. Maybe he should welcome this respite. But, he felt cheated and angry. While he was busy "making it," he had forgotten to truly live. Now, he could not stop asking himself these questions: "Was it worth it?" "Where is the happiness I should have been seeking?" He did not have the answers. He felt empty for he was alone, old, a stranger to his children, and no one to love him. So every day, he sadly sat alone on his couch or on the deck of his pricey boat, sipping his expensive wine, listening to the radio, drowning in self pity, and all the while asking himself: "Where did I go wrong?"

In "somewhere," on a fine summer day, the happy grandfather, who so many years ago missed the fast train, took his grandchildren fishing. He spotted a beautiful yacht anchored. Sitting alone on the deck was a tired, sad-looking, dreary old man. The grandfather's heart twisted. As he passed, he nodded to the old man. One day, he stopped and asked: "Would you like to join us fishing?" The old man looked at him bewildered and shook his head "no." Every day he continued to ask the old man to join him. Eventually, the old man did, and a friendship developed. One day, the old man stared oddly at him and said: "Now I know why you seemed familiar! You are the man who missed the train so many years ago!" "How did you ever get here?" To that the grandfather replied, "I was lucky enough to have missed the express, I caught a slower train; nevertheless, I am here now." The old man pensively said, "Imagine that! We both ended up here together! Whereas I am sick, tired, and lonely. You, on the other hand, are happy and healthy." The grandfather smiled and said: "Success is not necessarily happiness. Very few people get to learn that, and even fewer have both. Sometimes, it may be easier to find a middle ground. It wasn't all fun and games, I had some real challenges, shed a few tears, and moved on. Fortunately for me, I made the right choices. It is not entirely too late for you. I am glad we caught up to each other. From now on, you should savor every moment of your life, and please don't despair about the missing "opportunities," you can still make the most of what time you have left."

Bethsie_P_Gousse